


A brief lesson

by ThePamelaOracle



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Destiel - Freeform, Fluff and Crack, M/M, Oral Sex, Panty Kink
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-16
Updated: 2017-10-16
Packaged: 2019-01-18 01:02:15
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,526
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12377670
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThePamelaOracle/pseuds/ThePamelaOracle
Summary: Castiel needs new underwear. Dean is less than helpful but likes to give blow jobs.





	A brief lesson

**Author's Note:**

  * For [sconesandtextingandmurder](https://archiveofourown.org/users/sconesandtextingandmurder/gifts).



> Wishing my very dear friend @sconesandtextingandmurder a very happy birthday! My life is so much better with you in it! xoxoxo.
> 
> This may be the waving of a white flag... 
> 
> (thank you to PecanpieDean and @blue_morning for betaing!)

Humanity, it turns out, is full of stupid decisions with unforeseen painful repercussions. Cas ponders this as he stands in the men’s wear section of JC Penny. He fell six months ago, and his vessel is currently bruised and chafed. Worse, some of the vamps got away. Of these things, he knows that only the chafing could have been prevented, or so Dean tells him. He still blames himself for the vamps getting away. 

“Dean, I don’t understand.” Cas says not for the first time. He’s standing in the excessively large underwear section -- in his right hand a pair of white plain briefs in the other cotton boxers. 

“Dude, that’s grampa underwear, Cas. Hot guy like you needs to package the package better.” Dean laughs at his own joke and he holds up a minimalist red trunks. “What about these?”

Cas looks at them like they have personally offended him in some way. The man on the front looks impossibly, hugely and perfectly hung. From millennia on earth, he knows that he’s not real, but this new humanity is prone to insecurities. He shoves them back on the shelf. “No.” 

Dean shrugs and walks over to the next row. He doesn’t get it, Cas thinks, Dean could be the perfectly dicked man on the box. “I love these,” Dean shout from two rows over. Cas finds him holding up a pair of silky looking short, boxer-brief Dean calls them. They have a growling bear on them. 

“Anyone who wears bears over their genitals is most likely hiding some sort of insecurity,” Cas is trying out snark this week. But the skin on his thighs still hurts -- longer softer boxers would help. 

“Hey, play nice! You know I have a pair of these. I love them on long ...hunts,”  Dean says and wiggles his hips. “Special fabric keeps the junk nice and dry. No chafing. Plus, you know you have a bear in your pants. Raaaaaaaaaaaaawr.” Dean makes a clawing motion with his hands. Cas laughs and shakes his head.   
  


 

Chafing is of course what landed them here in the first place. Dean may have been nice and comfy in his bear briefs but Cas was wearing Jimmy’s old plain white boxers. They were cotton. They were old. His mojo gone, the elastic on his underwear had dissolved from almost eight years of constant daily wear. He’d gone commando at the bunker, but felt odd on hunts without something between his dick and his jeans. (He also wanted to take his trusty trench coat but Dean had hidden it, saying that the “Columbo-on-a-bender look was so last season,” whatever the hell that meant.)

All was working just fine until this last hunt. It was hot and humid when they’d arrived at the vamp nest in Louisiana: his legs were already sweaty from the heat, when suddenly one of the fangs tripped him and he’d landed ass first in a puddle. The shorts chose that precise moment  to lose all structural integrity and take up residence up his butt-crack while leaving his balls and inner thighs exposed to chafing from the denim of his jeans. He could barely walk by the time they’d made it back to the motel. 

“Fuck, man, why didn’t you tell me you needed new underwear,” Dean said as he looked over Cas’s crotch with great concern.  

“I’ve been human for a short time.I don’t know what I need. I assumed underwear was one of those unnecessarily complicated human things.”

Dean laughed and kissed his forehead. “Yeah, I guess you wouldn’t. Well, you deserve something better for that fine fine ass anyway.”  He grabbed the metal trash can and dumped in what was left on the boxers, covered them in salt and set them on fire. He then covered Cas’s chafed skin with aloe and gave Cas a blow job to forget the pain. They’d both had worse days.

 

But the choice he’s facing right now is overwhelming and Cas doesn’t know where to begin. 

“Listen, just get one of each,” Dean says like he’s had 30 years to figure it out. “I prefer these.”  Dean is holding the tech-fabric boxer briefs. 

“I think you prefer something frilly and lacy,” Cas mumbles.

Dean nods and winks. “What’s your favourite colour?”

“What is it with you humans and all these ridiculous choices. What differences does it make?” Cas shouts. The clerk raises an eyebrow. Dean shrugs. 

“Okay, okay, spaceman…” 

“I’m a fallen angel, Dean. Not a spaceman.” 

Dean shakes his head and  grabs a package of orange Jockey trunks, a pair of Ethika boxer-briefs with sharks, and loose fitting Joe-Boxers with honey bees on them. He also grabs a thong. Cas shakes his head no. “Boyfriend’s choice. Let’s go home and you can put on a little fashion show for me.” 

“Dean, I…” Cas wants to protest but his human body seems to like the idea. The flesh is weak indeed. 

 

\-----

 

Sam is out on a hunt but they are in Dean’s room anyway. To Castiel’s surprise Dean does know a thing or two about underwear.  For instance, l oose boxers look best under suits. Tech boxer-briefs will prevent chafing under jeans especially on hunts. Still, Cas feels that left to his own devices, he’d rather not wear anything under his clothing at all. But he concedes that wicking is indeed useful in non-sexy hot sweaty situations . Dean, of course, prefers Cas in super-tight short trunks. Dean says they leave nothing to the imagination. 

“Why do you feel the need to imagine anything is beyond me. I am standing right here and you can have me. ”

Dean takes that as an invitation and tackles Castiel onto the memory foam. “We should have angel fashion show more often,” Dean mumbles into Cas’s ear. Cas would protest but, well, Dean is grinding against him. 

“Dude, those were old-man undies, saggy and unfit for your most spectacular assets.” Dean whispers in his ear while sliding a hand between them. He uses his index to trace the outline of Cas’s dick and balls. “I love the way this fabric feels but…”

Dean pulls down Cas’s trunks and wraps his hand around his boyfriend’s dick. “You’re right, skin on skin is better,” as he kisses a trail down his chest. “This here… this is the best part.” As he licks up Cas’s dick before bouncing off the bed much to Cas’s dismay. 

“You filthy tease... “

“Shhhhh…..” Dean says and he bring his finger to his lips.  

Dean gets up and makes a show of removing his jeans. He turns his back to Cas to seductively wiggle out of his jeans and present his naked ass in Cas’s direction. 

“Dean, not that I’m complaining. But, why aren’t you wearing anything under your jeans? Weren’t we just talking about the need for underpants?”

“For one it’s Saturday, laundry day. For two, it allows me to show you one of humanity's oldest and greatest inventions.” 

“And that would be…”

Dean crawls to the head of bed, ass up. He looks over his shoulder, waggles his eyebrows and spreads his cheeks.

“The butt plug.”

Not one to be begged, Cas pulls down his new favourite trunks and fucks his boyfriend into the mattress. 

 

\-----

 

Castiel crawls out of bed naked, and pulls on his sleep pants. 

“Whoa there, tiger.” Dean says “Aren’t you going to put underwear on with those?”

“Dean.”

“Dude, you should always wear boxers man.”

“But I wore boxers shorts when I made coffee this morning, you didn’t say anything about needing more clothing.”

“Yeah but boxers are underwear. Sleep pants are, well, pants. You need underwear.” 

“Why do I need underwear? These are flannel. Soft. ” Cas demonstrated by palming himself for Dean. “With easy access for other activities.” Dean licks his lips, but doesn’t concede. 

“But you need underwear under pants. That’s the rule.”

“It is not a rule. Besides, Sam’s not home. You’ll be pulling them off me soon enough.”

“Yeah but… what if we get attacked?”

“In the bunker?”

“In general.”

“What kind of creature will be slowed by underwear?” 

“An incubus.”

“Please. Then I will hope that I can either fight him off or that he uses lots of lube.”

“Cas.” Dean is still playing but there is an underlying serious tone to his voice. Joking about demons, Cas knows, is not Dean’s favourite thing. 

“Besides, I am sure my big bad hunter boyfriend will defend my honour, ” Cas lays on the sarcasm. Dean gets out of bed, puts on his boxers and his sleep pants. Only Dean can make getting dressed look this good. Cas closes the distance between them and pins Dean to the wall. He nips at Dean’s collarbone and licks up his neck to his ear.  

“My very sexy protector, who from now on, will only wear the very prettiest of satin and lace under his sleep pants,” Cas whispers.

“But hunts... ”

“Especially on hunts.” 

“Because… “

“You are worried about incubi and will need to defend me. And I don’t want to wear boxers under my sleep pants.”

Dean is not at all convinced but makes a mental note to order new panties. 


End file.
